Thursday, May 28, 2020

Top 200 Games of All Time: 190-181

See games

190: Medal of Honor

Year: 1999
System: PS1

I got a copy of the Official PlayStation Magazine. There was a center story that was an interview with
Spielberg where he talked about how exciting videogames as a medium was. 

He talked about how he could have symphony quality soundtracks with the disks and that technology has come far enough along to where the AI could react to what you were doing rather than just running at you. He talked about how they were programming the enemies to jump on grenades or take cover. 

I honestly didn't believe anything he was saying and expected the game to never exist. 

But we got it. Mission 2 especially stuck with me, the spy mission in the train station. You could hear some vague french music in the background that seemed to echo off the walls. The tension and anxiety built as you presented your papers to more and more German officers. 


189: Oregon Trail

Year: 1985
System: PC

Just the most brutal of dice rolls with every move you did. Would fording the river end with broken legs and lost supplies? Probably. Would half of your wagon party die of terrible disease, odds are in favor of it. And at some point would you spend too much time hunting and have to just discard a bunch of meat on the side of the road like white people actually did... you betcha!

But you know what, it was the only game on those somehow already outdated Apple II/DOS machines in your computer lab and you were happy to have it. Bang out your Mavis Beacon assignment and then switch over to the "learning" game. 

And when you inevitably died before reaching the west coast, you got to leave a curse word filled tombstone on the road, your semi-permanent mark on this game. 

188: Pokemon Red/Blue

Year: 1996
System: Gameboy

I came to Pokemon late. Long ago did the school yard stop talking of Red vs Blue vs Yellow. Everyone was looking to the next generation. 

My little brother bought a Gameboy Color fairly late in it's life and that's when I caught up on the classics. 

Pokemon Blue passed the time on a 4 hour car ride to the Ozarks in what felt like minutes. And that first game gave birth to my tradition of spending too much time trying to catch every Pokemon in the first grassy area and grinding up until I have a Pidgey maxed out with mega-pecs. 

187: Wii Sports

Year: 2006
System: Wii

Everyone knows the "dah dah dah dahhh dah dahhh dahhhhh" startup music for Wii Sports because this was the harbinger of the waggle revolution. 

Wii's were in such short supply that I spent roughly $100 more than face value and that was considered a good deal. After I got another Wii-mote and Twilight Princess, I legit could not afford another game for months. 

So you bet your ass I was playing bowling and baseball every weekend. I threw my arm out the first weekend I had this thing, throwing spicy fast balls before I realized you could cheese the hell of the controls. 

Wii Sports permeated the culture so much that even my grandma still has a Wii hooked up in her basement for the grand kids. She has two games, Wii Sports and a dancing game. 

186: Clock Tower

Year: 1995
System: PS1

The horror boom of the Saturn/PS1 era had it's hooks in me. After Resident Evil, I search for every
horror game I could find. 

This game had me staring at the PS1 mouse weekly at the local Babbages. The controls were dog shit. It was one of those move the cursor around the screen using the controller as if you had a mouse. 

But everything else around this game was great. The story had twists, the puzzles were hard but do-able, there were like eight endings, and anytime scissor man showed up, the music changed and you had seconds to figure out where to hide or fight. 

More than any other horror game of this time, Clock Tower force situational awareness on you. You needed to case a room as soon as you entered or else end up as a teenager chopped in half by a guy wielding giant scissors. You needed to know where you could hide or what could be used as a weapon.

185: The Simpsons Arcade Game

Year: 1991
System: Arcade

One of my fondest memories of my childhood was the day at Showbiz Pizza, for a buddies birthday, where each kid got a fist full of tokens, and four of us crowded around the Simpson Arcade cabinet. 

None of us had ever made it past the second mission. A third level was a schoolyard myth. "I heard it's in a blimp." "I heard it's at the Nuclear Power Plant."

It was this day, armed with the power of capitalism, that we all got to experience Springfield's Discount Graveyard for the first time together. And this would also be the first time we experienced what became a 90's beat-em-up staple, the elevator level. 

Xbox live released this briefly on their service and it wasn't until I had the power of unlimited continues that I realized this entire game is only about 35 minutes long. The magic of an arcade game you only could play a few times before you ran out of quarters was gone. You started seeing the seams of how they ripped money from unsuspecting kids allowances. Had I not played that version of the game, this likely would've been comfortably in the 80 range. 

184: Spider-man and Venom in Maximum Carnage

Year: 1994
System: Genesis

Roughly 14,000 beat-em-ups came out in the mid-90s era and only about 10 of them were actually any good. This was a gem. 

The sprites were maybe a little blurry looking, but if you crossed your eyes and just paid attention to the bright colors, this game looked great. 

It was fast, the combos felt good, and it was one of the first good comic book games we got. It was precious. Do you remember how cool it was when the first Xmen movie came out? You know, before we got 36 Avengers films? It was special like that. 

I couldn't afford comics and the internet was in it's infancy, so I had no clue why the hell Spider-man and Venom were teaming up... or what Carnage was, but I knew he was bad and I knew we had to punch him. 

183: Street Fighter 2

Year: 1992
System: SNES

My cousin got Street Fighter 2 for his birthday. Our only fighting game experience at this point was Mortal Kombat, but there started to be murmurs of a "superior" fighting game on the playground. 

Well, my cousin took the hit for us. He asked for and received Street Fighter 2, eating $80 of his birthday budget. 

Like everyone, we discovered jamming buttons to make Ehonda do his fast punches and Blanka do the electricity early. Then we tried to figure out how we were jumping off the walls with Vega and Chun-li. And eventually one of us would accidentally throw a fireball with Ryu and spend the rest of the night trying to recreate it. 

I never got good at these style of fighting games where all of the moves required half or quarter circles. I want to be good at it so bad, but it's just not a thing that clicked. 

I'll still pop a quarter into a faded arcade machine, quickly beat Blanka, and then lose to Ken with a smile on my face. 


182: Super Mario 2

Year: 1988
System: NES

There's nothing worse than the ending to Super Mario 2. To find out your entire adventure was nothing but Mario's dream... get bent. That's creative writing 101. Don't kill the protagonist for a cheap emotional reaction and don't do dream sequences. 

The main reason it sucks is because Mario 2 (Doki Doki Panic) is actually a really good game. The level design is varied, the puzzle aspects clever, and it has some of the all time best Mario boss fights. Throwing bombs at Mouser, the classic Birdo fights that end ever level, and Triclyde who tested your dodging skills. 

I'd usually play it safe and use the Princess hover power, not realizing there was some benefit to being able to pick items up and dig fast with Toad or jump incredibly high with Luigi.

It's a shame Nintendo has decided to distance themselves as much as they can from this world. I would love a New Super Mario 2 on the Switch. 

181: Simpsons Hit and Run

Year: 2003
System: Gamecube

Crazy Taxi is an incredibly addictive game. Now what if you opened Crazy Taxi up to a larger world and dropped a Simpson's coat of paint on it. 

That's basically Hit and Run. This is by far the best Simpson's game ever released. The driving physics felt great, the mission structure was chaotic and had a great balance of barely beating it, but feeling like you accomplished a great feat. And the voice acting was top notch, something you would hope for with a Simpson's game. 

It was a blast to drive around Springfield and see where all the set pieces actually fit into the city. 


Tuesday, May 26, 2020

Top 200 Games of All Time: 200-191

200: Tetris

Year: 1989
System: Gameboy

Blasphemy! One of the top selling games of all time at 200? The inspiration for essentially every puzzle game ever made! 

Well buckle up, cause games that were inspired by Tetris show up much higher on this list. Honestly, out of all the games on my list, this one traveled and up and down the most. It peaked around the 30 mark, but I felt like I was supposed to have it there and not that I actually wanted it there. I like some of the other puzzle games better than Tetris, but that doesn't take away from how good it is. 

My list of favorite games was damn near 400, so the fact that this was in the top half of games I just considered good, says a lot.

199: Mario and Luigi: Partners in Time

Year: 2005
System: DS

Not starting off great. I can already see people jumping down my throat for putting this over Mario RPG. Well... I never had Mario RPG, but I did have Partners in Time and I found it charming and addictive. 

This was also the game where I learned about the rampant DS bootleg market. I bought this from Gamestop and then tried to re-sell it on eBay. And I got an angry email from my buyer. And then when I told the buyer I had no idea what he was talking about, I got 8 pages explaining different ways to spot bootleg DS carts. I gave the guy a refund at at some point lost the cart in my couch cushion. 

198: Donkey Kong

Year: 1986
System: NES

This was the ultimate trial and error NES game. It didn't fell unfair like some games (Looking at you Bayou Billy, you piece of...) but it was challenging. Although it only had like 4 stages, they were a challenge every time you played there. There wasn't really "memorizing" the stages cause things would always bounce weird, frame rates would drop randomly, and there's always that terrible moment where you felt cocky and you tried to get one over the big gorilla. 

It never worked out and you always lost a life. 

197: Mariokart 64

Year: 1996
System: N64

My cousin dragged a kitchen chair into the room, attached a steering wheel to the kitchen table / entertainment center, and put pedals on the floor. I sat 18 inches from the screen and played until 3 in the morning.

I had played the SNES version of Mariokart and I was a seasoned veteran of Wacky Wheels on the PC, but nothing prepared me for the chaos of a 3D racing game.

I was total dogshit and still largely am, but somehow Nintendo pulling off four player split screen with very little slowdown was life changing. I only had one friend who had a TV big enough to actually play four player split screen, but those Friday nights locked in the battle mode were special. 

196: Sonic Adventure

Year: 1998
System: Dreamcast

That demo Sears had playing over and over again of Sonic outrunning the whale... that alone gets you on the top 200 list. 

To this date, Sonic Adventure is one of the few 3D Sonic games to feel fast and capture the general feeling of Sonic the Hedgehog.

If not for the short comings of the Dreamcast controller or some of the mid-game confusion around what you needed to do, this game would've been much higher on the list. 

195: Ice Hockey

Year: 1988
System: NES

Nintendo sort of knocked it out of the park on their first try. This game is old enough to where they could just call it Ice Hockey cause nothing else existed like it yet.

Some people might get pictures of Blades of Steel in their brain, but as soon as you talk about the fat guy, everyone knows this game. You built a team around a skinny fast guy, a very average guy, and a fat slow guy and dammit, that's all the strategy we needed in 1988. 

In instead of getting an expensive license like the NHL or Olympics, Nintendo kept it simple and opted for generic national teams of countries that probably played ice hockey.

194: CyClones

Year: 1994
System: PC

My dad worked with a bunch of tech nerds in the early to mid-90s, which meant every now and then, when I went to sign into the ole Hewlett-Packard on the weekend, I'd find random CD-ROMs and Floppy Disks hanging out. Most of the time is was dumb Simpsons WAV files, but sometimes I found find games. 

One of those games was CyClones. You know Raven Software, the people that bring you many of your favorite Call of Duty maps? This was one of their early gigs. 

I was used to playing Doom where everything technically lived on the same plane of existence or Duke Nukem 3D where if you dared press the Page Up button you'd shoot your weapon into a distorted reality. This was the first first person shooter to use the mouse look. Eat shit Half Life, CyClones beat you to the punch by 4 years. 

193: Costume Quest

Year: 2010
System: PC

This was Double Fine's Renaissance period. Their second coming. Costume Quest, Double Fine Adventure, Stacking, The Cave... all these very charming puzzle games in a time where we were duct taping chainsaws to our giant machine guns. 

This RPG stayed the perfect amount of time, once credits rolled you felt like it had reached a nice conclusion. You didn't have the grind you get in Final Fantasy games. I also happen to be working on a similar game with my brother at the time. Costume Quest beat us to market by a long shot and did it much better than we probably would have.   

192: Earthworm Jim

Year: 1994
System: Genesis

This slot was a constant battle between Earthworm Jim and Vector Man. I loved the 2D run and gun platformers of the Genesis era, but could only find one spot on the list for them. And that number is 192. 

They were able to have these big beautiful sprites and not sacrifice frame rate or speed. When many games would slow down character movement or felt like you were running through syrup, the Earthworm Jims of the world sprinted and fired a machine pistol.

This was one of the first games that I felt captured that Saturday morning cartoon / Ren and Stimpy art style.

191: LHX Attack Chopper

Year: 1990
System: PC

There was a time in PC gaming before the ASDW keyboard scheme wasn't standard yet and you would find your hands playing finger Twister on the keyboard. This was one of those games. Legit, I tried to play it on the Internet Archive and I couldn't figure out how to take off even.

My friends and I thought the maps in LHX were infinite. You could pick a direction and just keep flying, always finding little patches of enemies here and there. 

There was nothing more satisfying than loading up a Hellfire missile and firing it on a lone bazooka carrying infantry man on the ground. 

The best this game felt was when you locked onto a tank and while dodging it's ground fire just unloaded everything you had. The use of 3D space felt great (in 1990).